At first, it seemed appropriate to focus this article on the basic “ingredients” of mental wellness; the things our bodies need to function at full capacity, both physically and mentally.
We all know how important it is for children (and adults) to get enough sleep, engage in exercise, and eat a healthy diet. However, it seems more fitting to go beyond that and discuss specific strategies parents can use to improve children’s mental well-being, not only during these summer months, but also for years to come.
1. Develop their growth mindset.
This is a more realistic twist on “positive thinking.” While a noble goal and a valuable tool, it is not practical to think positively in every situation. Sometimes children (and adults) have to approach a difficult situation as an opportunity for growth. There are some simple ways that parents and caregivers can begin developing this mindset in their children.
If you have ever worked in a school setting or heard of Carol Dweck, you may have heard the phrase, “the power of yet.” It is, in my opinion, the single most important concept you can teach your child to develop their growth mindset. Your child may not be able to do a certain task or understand a certain academic topic at a given point in time. However, it is just that…a snapshot of that moment in time. He can’t tie his shoes…yet. She didn’t get the correct answer for that math problem…yet. By teaching your child the “power of yet,” you are helping him see that the most important goal is putting in the effort to learn and improve. The outcome may be important, but we create resilient and determined children when we celebrate effort and persistence along the way.
2. Let them play!
A balance of both structured and unstructured play is important to a child’s developing brain.
Structured Play
Structured play is the time that your child is engaging in a goal-oriented activity that requires him or her to follow rules and directions. This can include organized sports, summer camps, board games, puzzles, etc. Structured activities are valuable for several reasons. They create opportunities for learning new skills and often require effort and perseverance to meet the goal of the activity. Achieving these goals can increase self-esteem and self-confidence.
Unstructured Play
Unstructured play is the time in which your children can choose their activities, create their own rules (within reason), and decide what the goal of their activity is. This gives children the opportunity for creativity and using their imagination to entertain themselves, and it will reduce the experience of boredom over time. Unstructured play allows children to engage in problem-solving because they are in control of their play and must decide how to accomplish their goals. When unstructured play involves other children, it is an excellent opportunity for children to learn new social skills by verbalizing their ideas, working together, and resolving disagreements. As children are doing these things independently, they are building self-confidence in their ability to accomplish things.
3. Foster healthy relationships. This includes other children and other safe adults.
Adults
Let’s face it, there are times when children will not want to talk to their parents about certain things! As a parent, you should make an effort to open up lines of communication with your kiddos. Equally important is fostering healthy relationships between your child and other safe adults. Each child should have a safe and healthy relationship with at least five adults throughout their life. Adult brains are simply more capable of reasoning! When your child won’t talk to you about certain topics, they need to have a safe adult to help them think things through.
Peers
When children are around other children, they will learn social skills through observation, practice, and imitation. They will have the opportunity to make inferences about how their behavior and words impact other children. This leads to developing appropriate communication skills and empathy, as well as learning how to set personal boundaries and maintain boundaries with others. All of these skills will help your child choose appropriate friends and maintain healthy friendships, which will protect them from unnecessary stress.
Fostering mental wellness does not have to take a lot of time. Simply be intentional with the time you do have. Parents can work these three tips into their daily routines and share this information with others who will interact with their children. Taking these steps can make a huge impact on a child’s confidence and self-esteem, thus setting them up for success in the years to come!
Carlsbad Municipal School District
The Carlsbad Municipal School District has partnerships with various organizations to provide students across the district with social-emotional lessons, alternatives to discipline, suicide prevention, skills to avoid risky behaviors, and a positive school climate and culture. Through these partnerships, our staff are also receiving support in developing trauma-informed teaching skills, dealing with behavioral challenges, and suicide prevention. School staff are also providing targeted interventions based on school, group, and individual needs and can respond to referrals from parents, teachers, and the students themselves.
Article written by Crystal Smith and originally published in Focus on Carlsbad 2024 Summer edition.
Crystal Smith
Crystal Smith is a “soccer mom” to two girls and a Girl Scout Leader for their troop. She has experience in outpatient mental health counseling and residential substance abuse treatment within the Carlsbad community. She is currently a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and employed as the Mental Health Specialist for the Carlsbad Municipal School District.
